Sunday, January 31, 2021


is it that long already?

photo by Karen Zhao at Unsplash


you could be with me today
but i am all by myself
in the train
watching little squares of glass
coloured paint
of apartment blocks
rushing by
and the evening sky
threatening to weep.

we could be in a restaurant today
maybe not a fancy one
but nevertheless one
we wanted to try
because i can afford it now
and a couple of
working class beers of course.

but now i am all by
in the train
with anonymous faces
with the sad masses
going home
their rush hour hands
pushing at my shoulders.

and coming out of the tunnels
i wanted to call your name
but the words
the words
they never come

the evening sky
had started to turn grey
about to weep.

written 21/09/2010
revised 21/09/2018

Pink Floyd - Time

© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2021

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Anonymous Ron. Lavalette said...

Lonely & reminiscent. Perfectly expressed. Been there. Awesome work.

31 January, 2021 22:49  
Blogger C. Sandlin said...

This just catches the heart and doesn't let go. Lovely and full of what-ifs.

31 January, 2021 22:54  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


Thank you! :)


yes, the what-ifs.
thank you! :)

31 January, 2021 23:35  
Blogger Debi Swim said...

Oh, set that to music. What a melancholy tribute to what if

01 February, 2021 00:58  
Blogger indybev said...

A sad soliloquy, one oft repeated by lonely travelers, I'd guess. Well penned.

01 February, 2021 01:54  
Blogger Rommy said...

Thoughts of what could-have-been are an excruciating form of self-torture.

01 February, 2021 02:47  
Blogger Helen said...

An amazing poem ... beautifully composed. I enjoyed the message, emotion ... every word.

01 February, 2021 03:57  
Blogger Magaly Guerrero said...

So many bittersweet things to love about this poem: the speaker's longing for what could be, the use of the environment to show the speaker's state of mind (the final about burst into tears is brilliant), the clarity of details ("their rush hour hands / pushing at my shoulders", I can practically feel their fingers). Sigh.

01 February, 2021 04:58  
Blogger Marja said...

Great poem It depicts the atmosphere and feeling so well

01 February, 2021 07:02  
Blogger robkistner said...

This took me to a familiar place — well written.

01 February, 2021 11:53  
Blogger Jenna said...

This speaks to my heart.

01 February, 2021 12:20  
Blogger Rosemary Nissen-Wade said...

And now I am tearful! For me the very saddest line was 'because i can afford it now', speaking so eloquently of loss and futility, and time having moved on.

01 February, 2021 12:25  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


ah, set to music! that's an idea! :)


yes, even in a crowded city, one can be lonely. :(


Indeed, a form of self-torture. :(

01 February, 2021 21:01  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


Thank you! :)


Thank you! glad you liked those details. for anyone who has travelled on the subway/metro, this will be quite relatable. :)


Thank you! :)

01 February, 2021 21:49  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


Thank you! :)


Thank you for the kind comment. :)


Thank you!
that line speaks of futility, and regret. she could not enjoy that pricey food anymore, and i would not want to try it on my own.

01 February, 2021 22:25  
Blogger J Cosmo Newbery said...

Wistful and a long for what may have been. Very emotive.

02 February, 2021 17:39  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Thank you, Cosmo! :)

02 February, 2021 18:07  
Blogger hyperCRYPTICal said...

Longingly sad, beautifully expressed.

02 February, 2021 18:32  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Thank you, Anna. :)

02 February, 2021 21:43  
Blogger Kim M. Russell said...

This poem really spoke to me. It reminded me of the last time I went to my daughter’s by train, a year ago, just before the first lockdown in the UK. I love the image of the ‘little squares of glass / coloured paint / of apartment blocks / tessellated’, and the way you evoked the feeling of being alone on a train, surrounded by strangers. The ending is haunting.

03 February, 2021 04:12  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Thank you, Kim.
it can be strange, that even on a crowded train, one can feel lonely.

03 February, 2021 22:31  
Blogger Rajani Rehana said...

Fabulous blog

04 February, 2021 21:39  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Thank you, Rajani. :)

04 February, 2021 23:48  
Blogger colleen said...

I just love this, the structure, the scenes described, the melancholy, the aloneness. I wish I had thought of it and wrote it! Bravo!

07 February, 2021 23:50  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Thank you, Colleen, for your kind words. :)

08 February, 2021 21:52  
Blogger Priscilla King said...

Who'd be a twenty-something yuppie in the city again? It's easy to remember the good things from the past and forget the angst. Thanks for reminding us.

15 February, 2021 19:22  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

haha, "twenty-something yuppie in the city "!
it's just that time flies, and sometimes what we just left are memories.

thanks for the visit to my blog! :)

15 February, 2021 21:37  

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