Sense
This is just fiction. Thank goodness.
photo by Hebi B at pixabay
Sense
They were sitting on a bench in the park, under the shade of old trees, from the mid-afternoon sun, watching a glassy pond. Just two hours ago, they were total strangers in a cafe in another part of the city. He was a writer, trying to find some inspiration, minding his own business. She was there having a coffee, alone. He had noticed her earlier, because she seemed agitated. Then she started to undress. First her blouse, then her brassiere. Before more could be removed, he acted, wrapping his jacket over her.
“I really don’t know what happened back there”, she said, “I felt so hopeless”
“Yours is not the only bizarre happening this week. A man jumped off a bridge, shouting the end is near. A disabled guy held up a store. A surge of crazy stuff in the news”, he said.
“What are you afraid of?” she suddenly asked.
“The loss of my faculties”, he replied.
“I am afraid of fire. Dying by fire. I am really scared”, she volunteered. “I have told my boss I am staying with my sister down at Reno for a few days.”
“Ah, I am planning a road trip up north, away from this sin city for a while. Recharge, maybe.”
Then they hugged, promised to keep in touch, and left their separate ways.
It was almost night when the squat truck pulled into a carpark in the middle of town. The driver was instructed to park the truck at a particular spot, press a button on a little box and leave the town. Easiest big money in years, he thought. In the back of the truck was a big vending machine, securely fastened. In the vending machine was a crude but working nuclear bomb.
Sitting in the driver’s seat, he took out the metal box and put a greasy finger to the button.
01/05/2019
**********
313 words. Exactly. I would like to develop on the characters and the earlier events but that would mean exceeding the word limit. Maybe I will work on the expansion later. :)
Pink Floyd - Two Suns in the Sunset
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2019
Sense
They were sitting on a bench in the park, under the shade of old trees, from the mid-afternoon sun, watching a glassy pond. Just two hours ago, they were total strangers in a cafe in another part of the city. He was a writer, trying to find some inspiration, minding his own business. She was there having a coffee, alone. He had noticed her earlier, because she seemed agitated. Then she started to undress. First her blouse, then her brassiere. Before more could be removed, he acted, wrapping his jacket over her.
“I really don’t know what happened back there”, she said, “I felt so hopeless”
“Yours is not the only bizarre happening this week. A man jumped off a bridge, shouting the end is near. A disabled guy held up a store. A surge of crazy stuff in the news”, he said.
“What are you afraid of?” she suddenly asked.
“The loss of my faculties”, he replied.
“I am afraid of fire. Dying by fire. I am really scared”, she volunteered. “I have told my boss I am staying with my sister down at Reno for a few days.”
“Ah, I am planning a road trip up north, away from this sin city for a while. Recharge, maybe.”
Then they hugged, promised to keep in touch, and left their separate ways.
It was almost night when the squat truck pulled into a carpark in the middle of town. The driver was instructed to park the truck at a particular spot, press a button on a little box and leave the town. Easiest big money in years, he thought. In the back of the truck was a big vending machine, securely fastened. In the vending machine was a crude but working nuclear bomb.
Sitting in the driver’s seat, he took out the metal box and put a greasy finger to the button.
01/05/2019
**********
313 words. Exactly. I would like to develop on the characters and the earlier events but that would mean exceeding the word limit. Maybe I will work on the expansion later. :)
Pink Floyd - Two Suns in the Sunset
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2019
Labels: apocalypse, dark, fear, Prose, short story
posted by dsnake1 at 11:36 PM
19 Comments:
Whoa. You captured my interest right away. The twist ending was unexpected (I thought he would offer her a road trip. Smiles.) Looks like her worst fear came to pass. Needless to say, the man pressing the button got an unexpected ending as well. Well done. I could easily see this as a short story. Maybe he did offer her a road trip, so they both were out of town at the end.........
Oh this would be a true disaster that would probably change the course of the world.. everyone's worst fears coming true.
I bet the wildness of their actions say a lot about their motivations. It would be nice to explore their whys (i.e. the removal of clothing, the reasons behind the robbery, what inspires that horror promised by that ending).
Expansion seems like a great idea. I, too, ended up with three little stories out of this month's topic. I might share the others... in future prompts.
This is going to stay with me. There's always those days (or weeks) when everyone seems to be on edge and this just takes that feeling and runs. Would be interested to see what happens next--maybe. :)
Ha, I left a message early this morning that may have disappeared........or maybe this is nighttime where you are. LOL. I really found this piece gripping, Lee San, and how clever to have managed exactly 313 words. And I am so glad this is fiction and let's hope it stays that way. One never knows, any more. At first I thought he was going to offer the woman a road trip.....the surprise ending caught me off guard. Excellent writing.
Wow, what a powerful write. I really did not expect that ending. It took me by surprise. Indeed we all have our fears...but a fear of a nuclear bomb is definitely the 'mother of all fears.'
Most intriguing. I read it that the truck driver was another manifestation of the general craziness; also that the couple would have their fears realised by dint of the bomb. So in those ways there was a completeness to the tale. However I would enjoy an expansion. Also I wonder very much WHY the craziness.
I'm pretty pleased to find this site. I need to to thank you for ones time for this particularly fantastic read!!
I definitely liked every bit of it and i also have you book-marked to look at new things
in your site.
Ouch! The final twist was really appalling!
Sherry,
I left the story open-ended, let the reader draw their own conclusions... :)
Bjorn,
at one time, this was what everyone feared. there will always be rogue scientists, rogue leaders and people willing to kill and die for an ideology. :(
Magaly,
thank you!
i seems that the people doing the wild acts sensed an impending catastrophe. :)
My heart is still pounding from the unraveling of events! I would love it if you ever choose to expand on this story!❤️
Chrissa,
these are stressful days... :)
Sherry,
yes, it's the pesky time zones.
actually, the original draft was more than the limit, so i trimmed it down to ... 313 words.
yes, let's hope this scenario remains just that, fiction.
Mary,
the threat may not come from other sovereign countries, but from rogue/terrorist organisations. but then again, we can never tell. :(
Rosemary,
ah, let me think about the expansion. it will surely run into many pages.
the truck driver in the story, he's just a mule, thought he's making some easy money. there are the puppet masters behind.
i made it that there are people who are sensitive to impending disasters, and they are just freaking out. :)
Sumana,
yes, the final twist is quite unexpected. :)
Sanaa,
thank you.
let me think about the expansion. 😀
Such and intense story, but that ending with a twist really grabbed me, and will linger in my thoughts.
Lord, we never know where terror will come from. She seemed to have a premonition.
This sounds like the plot to a suspenseful movie. The craziness, though, makes me think of some of the craziness that goes on in our real world. You certainly created a story of fear.
I'm truly enjoying the design and layout of your site.
It's a very easy on the eyes which makes it much more
enjoyable for me to come here and visit more often. Did you hire out a developer to create
your theme? Fantastic work!
Carrie,
thank you! :)
Susie,
premonition is it!
always glad to see you.
Myrna,
i hope Hollywood takes note. :)
in this off-kilter world, nothing surprises us much nowadays.
Hi Anon of 07 May
Thank you.
No hiring of developers. just Blogger's free stuff. :D
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