Saturday, May 26, 2007

May kukai : of the animal world

It happened. My entry for haikuworld's May Free Format kukai garnered a total of ......... zero votes. The theme was "of the animal world", and I was trying to show how intelligent crows can be. Guess it didn't work out. :D

Oh well, to the next kukai then.

supposed to be a crow, but....
image by dsnake1

catch me

bird culler with gun
crow taunts
from crowded mall.

the sketch is supposed to be a crow but it turns out to be like some prehistoric monster bird. :)

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Blogger Bluesky_Liz said...

If I saw that I would have been amused.:D

Our birds, not just crows, are pretty street smart like that.

As for the drawing, it might be the claws that are a bit too eagle-like. The head (especially the fat beak) and body looks accurate enough.

27 May, 2007 16:34  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

except the pigeons. :)

you are right about the drawing, Liz. I tried to warp the drawing by making the bird a bit more fearsome, but i guess it didn't quite turned out right. I have seen a drawing for Ted Hughes' Crow, and it was awesome. :)

27 May, 2007 22:18  
Blogger Pat Paulk said...

Maybe it had something to do with culling the birds with a gun.

27 May, 2007 23:42  
Blogger Bluesky_Liz said...

I think I agree with Pat.

I think a lot of reader may think culling crows with guns is an overkill.

They were using air guns shooting pellets or something. But when you say a gun, it probably sounds pretty serious.

...actually it is kinda of an overkill.

And it didn't work anyway. :P I think they've stop doing it.

Interestingly, a friend of mine who did her master's research on birds and tree preferences (many years back) found that our bird problem could have been solved by planting different type of trees. But of course, whoever was in authority wanted a quicker way of doing things.


28 May, 2007 21:35  
Blogger magiceye said...

:) crows day out at the mall!

28 May, 2007 22:19  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

probably you are right, we have had enough of violence.

i don't know whether that haiku puts readers off, it's interesting to know. it's not pretty stuff, no puppies or doves or things like that :) this piece was intended to show the intelligence of crows.

i appreciate your comments, it offers an insight into what could be wrong with the haiku. :)


28 May, 2007 22:51  
Blogger gautami tripathy said...

You did much better with that sketch. Mine...nothing to brag about!

I like the kukai too.

I am fond of crows!

29 May, 2007 00:56  
Blogger polona said...

nothing to lose sleep over, dsnake :)
more experienced poets have been there...
i like crows so i like the message too, but i reckon it's not really kukai stuff... as you proavly know, not easy to select among more than 100 poems...

i have nothing to write home about from this kukai, either :)

29 May, 2007 03:13  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you!

when can we see some of your sketches? :)

thanks for your kind words.
no, i won't be losing sleep over it, i will be looking forward to the next one. :)

i am still learning.

29 May, 2007 19:08  
Blogger floots said...

strange - i've come to your blog after half an hour spent chasing the crows away from the food i'd left out for the small birds
i have a sneaking respect for crows - their intelligence and persistence
your poem sums that up
thank you

30 May, 2007 00:02  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

what a coincidence.
thank you!

31 May, 2007 21:24  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Imsorry to hear that it did not get a vote...But I did not know about it ..I would have vote for you

Do we still get a chance or no


02 June, 2007 04:44  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

no problem, nasra.
thank you so much. :)

02 June, 2007 22:02  
Blogger Medusa aka expiringpoet said...

i didnt think the sketch was bad. But what do i know...i cant even manage a straight line drawing..bah! Nice kukai, cheeky!

13 June, 2007 15:02  

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