Sunday, August 31, 2008

rick mobbs' image prompt (3)

The workload at the office is getting crazy, so the posts are a bit far in between.

But I still managed to write something, thanks to Rick Mobbs' image prompt. And why am I seeing doom and gloom again? :)

Painting by Rick Mobbs
painting by Rick Mobbs

i see a raven in the sky

the choppers
     break out
         from rusty clouds

         like birds
     of prey
eyes keen

blood hungry
targets locked

quietly as
smoke rings

above the paddies
     the rain trees

then just below
a rain of
hot metal

ploughs the fields
     the mud huts

a demon hand
sweeping tearing

fear-filled eyes
tired bodies

the lotus leaves
from the ponds


© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 )

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Anonymous rick said...

You are probably seeing doom and gloom because, while this was a collaboration done in the spirit of play with my 8 year old son, I was also angry. The war (our war in Iraq) was much on my mind. The cruelty and idiocy of it, the stupidity, the spinelessness of the Democrats, their complicity, the lack of effective opposition to the war... all that was consciously working its way in, too.

So, I appreciate your take on the picture. It is quite apt.

31 August, 2008 12:45  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


sometimes i do see things in a different light from others.i have no idea this painting was done in the spirit of play,
and if i had opened old wounds, it is unintentional.

it is an excellent painting, and a powerful one too. i am glad i came to know of your image prompts.

in my opinion, the war in Iraq (the second one) should not have happened in the first place.

01 September, 2008 00:49  
Blogger polona said...

wow! you are good with this dark kind of poetry, and this is hauntingly beautiful.

01 September, 2008 01:41  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

>> dark kind of poetry

thank you, polona. :)

02 September, 2008 00:01  
Blogger magiceye said...

vivid imagery! lovely!

02 September, 2008 15:08  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


thank you! :)

02 September, 2008 22:55  
Blogger paisley said...

what an excellent take on the painting.. i can see and feel the waring taking place as the choppers circle overhead and the hot metal flies thru the air.. very viet nam,, very full of wisdom....

06 September, 2008 22:59  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi paisley,

thanks for visiting, and your comments. :)

so i must be doing something right. :)
i am glad that the words can evoke a picture of a war (vietnam comes to mind because it was a war fought extensively with helicopters). actually i wanted to write about a war in general, but i guess words like "paddies" and "lotus" helps to form that image.

it's interesting how rick's paintings can elicit different interpretations from his visitors.

07 September, 2008 01:01  
Anonymous christine said...

Hi, I came over here from your comment on my poem, crabapples...

I like how you arranged the words in this poem, imitating visually the flight of the bird.

Interesting, how you picked up on the mechanical aspects of the painting with the word chopper.

Nice work, I'm enjoying your poems.

19 September, 2008 01:03  
Blogger dsnake1 said...


thanks for the visit and your valuable comments. :)

in the painting i see metallic/mechanical elements in the subjects. the word "chopper" comes to mind and i write the poem around this word.

19 September, 2008 22:25  

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