rick mobbs' image prompt (3)
The workload at the office is getting crazy, so the posts are a bit far in between.
But I still managed to write something, thanks to Rick Mobbs' image prompt. And why am I seeing doom and gloom again? :)
painting by Rick Mobbs
i see a raven in the sky
the choppers
break out
from rusty clouds
like birds
of prey
eyes keen
blood hungry
targets locked
puff
quietly as
smoke rings
above the paddies
the rain trees
then just below
a rain of
hot metal
ploughs the fields
the mud huts
a demon hand
sweeping tearing
fear-filled eyes
tired bodies
the lotus leaves
shattered
torn
from the ponds
07/08/09
********
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 )
But I still managed to write something, thanks to Rick Mobbs' image prompt. And why am I seeing doom and gloom again? :)
painting by Rick Mobbs
i see a raven in the sky
the choppers
break out
from rusty clouds
like birds
of prey
eyes keen
blood hungry
targets locked
puff
quietly as
smoke rings
above the paddies
the rain trees
then just below
a rain of
hot metal
ploughs the fields
the mud huts
a demon hand
sweeping tearing
fear-filled eyes
tired bodies
the lotus leaves
shattered
torn
from the ponds
07/08/09
********
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 )
posted by dsnake1 at 12:56 AM
10 Comments:
You are probably seeing doom and gloom because, while this was a collaboration done in the spirit of play with my 8 year old son, I was also angry. The war (our war in Iraq) was much on my mind. The cruelty and idiocy of it, the stupidity, the spinelessness of the Democrats, their complicity, the lack of effective opposition to the war... all that was consciously working its way in, too.
So, I appreciate your take on the picture. It is quite apt.
rick,
sometimes i do see things in a different light from others.i have no idea this painting was done in the spirit of play,
and if i had opened old wounds, it is unintentional.
it is an excellent painting, and a powerful one too. i am glad i came to know of your image prompts.
in my opinion, the war in Iraq (the second one) should not have happened in the first place.
wow! you are good with this dark kind of poetry, and this is hauntingly beautiful.
>> dark kind of poetry
thank you, polona. :)
vivid imagery! lovely!
magiceye,
thank you! :)
what an excellent take on the painting.. i can see and feel the waring taking place as the choppers circle overhead and the hot metal flies thru the air.. very viet nam,, very full of wisdom....
hi paisley,
thanks for visiting, and your comments. :)
so i must be doing something right. :)
i am glad that the words can evoke a picture of a war (vietnam comes to mind because it was a war fought extensively with helicopters). actually i wanted to write about a war in general, but i guess words like "paddies" and "lotus" helps to form that image.
it's interesting how rick's paintings can elicit different interpretations from his visitors.
Hi, I came over here from your comment on my poem, crabapples...
I like how you arranged the words in this poem, imitating visually the flight of the bird.
Interesting, how you picked up on the mechanical aspects of the painting with the word chopper.
Nice work, I'm enjoying your poems.
christine,
thanks for the visit and your valuable comments. :)
in the painting i see metallic/mechanical elements in the subjects. the word "chopper" comes to mind and i write the poem around this word.
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