Saturday, January 06, 2007

i am the grass

I thought I would write something nice for the first post of the new year, but wrote nothing but a couple of pieces on war & the military. Maybe it's the bad week in the office.

image by dsnake1

i am the grass

i am the grass
the hard boots
of the troopers
trampled upon
going on recon
on ambush
on patrol

but today

i feed on their blood
and brass cartridges
as they left
in alarm
calling for choppers
for medic
for God.

i am the grass
i do not take sides.


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Blogger J. Andrew Lockhart said...

This is really good - very affective.

07 January, 2007 14:08  
Blogger Bluesky_Liz said...

Great stuff, Dsnake.

07 January, 2007 15:03  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

not really good! very bad poem

07 January, 2007 15:36  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi andrew,
thank you.
i wrote this looking at conflict from another angle.

hey liz,
thank you.

07 January, 2007 16:52  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi anon
sorry the poem didn't work for you. if you are thinking of poetry in traditional forms, then you will be disappointed because i write mostly in free verse.

perhaps you can drop me a mail telling me what is bad about this piece?

07 January, 2007 16:58  
Blogger Polona said...

wow! was my first reaction when i read this poem. great stuff, dsnake, and i love the image!

07 January, 2007 22:48  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thanks! i tend to enjoy writing on military stuff. :)

the image was a pencil drawing on a sketch pad, then scanned and saved digitally.

07 January, 2007 23:32  
Blogger floots said...

i think it works well
nature does not take sides
it is nature which will prevail

09 January, 2007 15:44  
Anonymous gel (Green-Eyed Lady) said...

Hi Dsnake,

I'm sorry you had a rough week at the office. From your preface, I knew this wouldn't be a light piece, but for some reason (probably my weird mood :) I though of the "I am the Walrus" poem instantly when I saw your title. That immediately changed upon reading this intense and powerful work. Superb use of personification!

Repetition of "I am the grass" pounds the horror home. "hard boots" leads the reader in to"Trampled upon" as you effectively build up the intensity so the reader must take notice.
This struck me here, piercing my heart (as it should) as you increase the intensity to emphasize the horrid bloodshed with

"but today /i feed on their blood"... "as they left in alarm" to that smashing ending:

"I am the grass/ I do not take sides" is still running through my head.
If only people were like the grass in your closing.

One of your best poems.

10 January, 2007 15:18  
Blogger Pat Paulk said...

Man, what a poem!! I'm glad it came out like it did!!

10 January, 2007 20:29  
Anonymous dead poet said...

Wow this is awesome! Time to rock the nation! :)

11 January, 2007 01:41  
Blogger gautami tripathy said...

One good first post in the new year. Love the sketch.

11 January, 2007 02:25  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you!
i hope nature will prevail too. :)

hi gel,
i really appreciate that dissection of my poem. it was wonderful, for the effort you put in.

i am very satisfied with this poem. when it was completed, it seems a load was taken off me, maybe because i put a lot of energy in it, choosing and weighing the words.

"I am the Walrus", is it that Beatles song? what makes you think of it? :)

glad that you enjoyed the poem.

i was afraid the piece might look a bit raw, but i guess it turned out ok. :)

hey DP,
bro, thanks!
what do you mean "time to rock the nation"? :)
i don't want any trouble. "evil grin".

thank you!
when i'm in the mood, my drawings turn out nice. :)

blogger is still acting funny here. couldn't sign in yesterday :)

11 January, 2007 20:50  
Anonymous Green-Eyed Lady (gel) said...

Whew, I was afraid my comment was too long, but I didn't see an email addy to send it to you there.
I was so struck by this poem, I came in here to read it yet again. It's that powerful!

P.S. I remember visiting your earlier site or maybe it was this one with archives. I found you through Liz.

12 January, 2007 01:39  
Anonymous gel said...

At first I thought of "I am the Walrus" due to the sound and similar language pattern in "I am the Grass." Then I thought of Lewis' Carroll's writing which was not on the topic you chose, but my mind meanders in ways only I can explain. (I'm so weird, despite how many people say it's "creative." ;)

I also remembered reading about Lennon like it's quoted below even though the Beatles were before my time. (Much of the music I use for posts on my site is before my time.)

Yes, it's the song but that's not the main reason I thought of it, although I'm very musical. See below for the info about the author Lewis Carroll, quoted from Wikepedia:

"The Walrus within the song is a reference to the walrus from Lewis Carroll's The Walrus and the Carpenter. Lennon later expressed dismay at learning that the Walrus was the villain within the poem (see below)."

I find it hard to edit in the comment boxes. Sorry for repetition.

12 January, 2007 01:47  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi gel,
i really appreciate the comments you made on the poem. :)

yes, my email link is gone, probably when i moved to the new blogger. i have restored it. thanks for the info.

looking at your artwork and photos and writings, you are one creative person, but aren't most creative people a bit weird? :)

it's interesting, how people are still trying to figure out Lennon's lyrics in the song, "I am a Walrus"
but i think Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland is not just a children's book, it is much deeper than that with hidden meanings. :)

12 January, 2007 09:08  
Blogger magiceye said...

excellent portrayal of war and peace.....stunning!

12 January, 2007 21:57  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi magiceye,
thanks for visiting and leaving your comments. you have an interesting blog too, i intend to go back for more visits.

i see that you are a fan of pink floyd and dire straits too. :)

12 January, 2007 22:46  
Blogger With Hammer And Tong...The LetterShaper said...

Beautifully done. Much enjoyed!

Please visit me at my Blog, if you like.

13 January, 2007 05:00  
Blogger sigmund fraud said...

"but today
i feed on their blood
and brass catridges..."

Loved those lines.

14 January, 2007 12:49  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi lettershaper,
thanks for visiting! i see you are a prolific writer. :)

will be back at your blog for more.

hi sigmund,
thank you!
i thought those lines will invoke images of fallen soldiers. guess it works! :)

14 January, 2007 15:02  
Blogger Inconsequential said...

Cool, liked that lots :)

15 January, 2007 04:49  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi inconsequential,
thanks! :)

15 January, 2007 07:30  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

is a very bad poem.BAD!

03 February, 2007 13:22  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi anonymous,
assuming you are the earlier anon, please read my comment to you. :)

of course, everyone is entitled to their own opinions.

03 February, 2007 16:51  

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