Saturday, August 27, 2011

janice

Do you still remember the first dance you had? I still do, though it happened eons ago. Probably because it's the first time, the partner is pretty, and the music in the right groove.

Anyway, I wrote this for NaPoWriMo 2009, and I am posting this for Poets' Rally Week 50. I hope this post can bring back memories of your first dance too...:)





pencil drawing by dsnake1



janice


always
that dance
       it plays
       all over
like a jammed vinyl
       when i hear
       that song
in a store
the train the radio
though it has been
almost
       a lifetime
since
we left
and still
like a bridge
across time
       i see
just the two
of us
though there are others
on the dance floor
       my hand
on your slim waist
your warm body
close to mine
a hint
of heady
perfume

and me
trying very hard
not to step
       on your shoes.



14/04/09
revised 23/06/09
****************




Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance.

Carl Sandburg





And this is the song that still thrills me...


to janice, wherever you are.


© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2011

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23 Comments:

Anonymous Ravenblack said...

Lovely, dsnake. How very innocent and endearing -- a pleasant date with subtle hints of two about to fall in love, and he's trying not to step on her shoes! :) Just can't help but smile at the image of this awkward young man.

27 August, 2011 19:31  
Anonymous poetryroad said...

Sweet as well as sensual in its innocense!

27 August, 2011 20:52  
Blogger Heaven said...

A sweet nostalgic poem... brings back some good memories.

I like the form too.

Nice to meet you~

27 August, 2011 23:07  
OpenID muzzleflashing.com said...

Fun poem. Liked hearing the song at the end to complete the image. I love Simon and Garfunkle, but I would have never thought of "Bridge Over Troubled Water" as a first dance song...Interesting, indeed. =)

28 August, 2011 04:39  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey there! I know this is kind of off topic but I was wondering if you knew where I could find a captcha plugin for my comment form? I'm using the same blog platform as yours and I'm having trouble finding one? Thanks a lot!

28 August, 2011 07:23  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Ravenblack,

Thanks! and hello, that awkward guy is me. :) like i said, it happened ages ago, but the incident still sticks in the memories.


poetryroad,

Thanks for visiting and leaving your comments.
innocent, yes, probably. :)


Heaven

Nice to meet you too! i like to use a lot of line breaks, it gives the reader time to pause and breathe. :)


muzzleflashing,

Thanks for visiting! The early 70's weren't known for dance tracks, and "Bridge Over Troubled Water" was certainly not intended as one, but the DJ played it that night and I have my first dance. (if i can call that a dance ) :)

and btw, you have a great website.

28 August, 2011 08:22  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Hi anon

i assume you are using blogger.

at your dashboard go to Settings > Comments tabs
then scroll down to "Show word verification for comments?" field and check the "Yes" radio button. Then click "save settings".

this should bring up the captcha. as blog author, you wouldn't see it.

28 August, 2011 09:46  
Anonymous deeju said...

your poem sounds like a soft wave coming towards us, just as the memories of our first dance come and bring in a smile upon us!

http://www.deejusongwriter.blogspot.com

29 August, 2011 21:45  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

deeju,

thanks for the visit and leaving your comments.

>> " a soft wave coming towards us " : i like that! :)

29 August, 2011 22:18  
Anonymous Fountains said...

Adore the last lines, lovely ending.

30 August, 2011 04:36  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Fountains,

thank you! the last few lines are supposed to be a twist to the whole poem. looks like it works. :)

30 August, 2011 07:16  
OpenID dandylion28 said...

Oooo so cute and sweet! Moments that are engraved in your mind forever.

31 August, 2011 00:56  
Blogger thingy said...

This is so wonderful. I love the words and the presentation. Very sweet. : )

31 August, 2011 02:59  
OpenID sillyfrogsusan said...

Yes, those magical moments of the "coming of age" last forever in songs!

31 August, 2011 19:01  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

dandylion,

glad you find it cute. :)
yes, these are moments that are engraved in the mind.


thingy,

thanks for the visit! :)


susan,

thanks for visiting! yes, i was looking for that phrase "coming of age", and you found it for me. :)

31 August, 2011 23:08  
Anonymous Emmanuel Ibok said...

I remember my first dance. It was in Sophomore year, Junior High. I had a crush on this girl and asked her for a dance. She was hesitant at first until a Senior made compelled her to dance with me.

I remember how nervous and naive I was on the dance floor.

This brought some good ol' memory.
Thanks for sharing.

Cheers!

01 September, 2011 11:33  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Emmanuel,

Thanks for the visit and comments! i remembered i was in secondary school then (equivalent to your junior high, i think) . it was at a birthday party of one of my sister's friends. i was really nervous, but still managed to strike up a conversation. we went out a few times after that, but that's about all.

i am glad this brought back some good memories for you. :)

01 September, 2011 20:16  
Blogger Ann LeFlore said...

Such a sweet poem and brings back memories. My entry this week is http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/09/01/life-memories/

02 September, 2011 05:13  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Ann,

thanks for your comments. :)

02 September, 2011 23:37  
Blogger Kay said...

Warm and meaningful. Very, very nice. Thank you!

03 September, 2011 00:16  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Kay,

thanks for the visit and your kind comments. :)

03 September, 2011 07:50  
Anonymous Short Poems said...

Beautiful work of creativity!

Take care
Marinela

06 September, 2011 14:28  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Marinela, thank you!

06 September, 2011 21:06  

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