Tuesday, December 18, 2007

hell notes

This is the 5th poem from my collection for the GPA 2007 competition.

This poem was written in a short span of time, almost no editing on it. And I think I quite like it, despite the morbid subject. I chopped it up in certain parts, like the snatches of conversations, or the outpourings of grief we witness at a Taoist funeral wake, which this poem is all about.

I am skipping the sequence and posting this piece first, because a good friend had recently passed away.

Painting of a crow by Kawanabe Kyosai
painting by Kawanabe Kyosai (1831 - 1889)
image from visipix.com

hell notes

they said
one moment
he was living
then a slight twitch
of muscles
fingers grasping


a page, a name
then when the ink dried
the book gently closed
the death god
dragged its chains
and sighed

and what is left
a face a name
a string
of memories
a portrait
in front
of a coffin

paper gold
to bribe

and a light
from an
oil lamp

to guide

the way

© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 )

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Blogger iamnasra said...

This is Powerful and amazing write up ...Yes ...so powerful writing

19 December, 2007 07:28  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you, Nasra.

i was afraid it might be too "local", but i guess it works. :)

19 December, 2007 09:29  
Blogger polona said...

dark and powerful but i like it.

20 December, 2007 03:45  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you!

maybe i write better on dark themes. :)

20 December, 2007 12:23  
Blogger J. Andrew Lockhart said...

very powerful!

20 December, 2007 14:13  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thanks, andrew! :)

20 December, 2007 15:47  
Blogger magiceye said...

powerful and poignant

20 December, 2007 17:13  
Blogger dsnake1 said...



20 December, 2007 22:55  
Blogger Deborah Vatcher said...

Fine work. Enjoyed this poem.

22 December, 2007 03:23  
Anonymous gautami tripathy said...

Very powerful. And I love crows..

23 December, 2007 00:06  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

hi deborah,
thanks for visiting. glad you like the poem. :)

thank you!
that's a very lovely painting by a Japanese painter. :)

23 December, 2007 00:32  
Blogger floots said...

a most touching piece dsnake
and you have chose the perfect illustration to complememnt it
thank you

23 December, 2007 15:42  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

that's a great compliment , floots!
thank you. :)

i thought this post would be appropriate for my late friend. when i came across this picture , i felt that this would be a good illustration for this poem.

23 December, 2007 22:19  

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