returning
Another from my SingPoWriMo archives, which seldom have many eyeballs. Reminiscing about my army days. This is one of those poems that "wrote itself". The muse kindly took my hand and glided it over the paper. Sigh.
photo by dsnake1
returning
returning back
to camp
from the hills,
no one noticed
that
daylight had broken,
the toads
had stopped croaking,
only
our muddy boots,
our rifles rusting
from last night's rain
and
the grass,
green and
slick with dew.
09/04/2016
**********
"as the black shell of a sky fell on us
my comrades, my brothers
my thoughts, their thoughts we tumbled towards
home."
-- dsnake1, excerpts from lonely when away from home
Shared on Poetry Pantry #323 at Poets United.
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2016
returning
returning back
to camp
from the hills,
no one noticed
that
daylight had broken,
the toads
had stopped croaking,
only
our muddy boots,
our rifles rusting
from last night's rain
and
the grass,
green and
slick with dew.
09/04/2016
**********
"as the black shell of a sky fell on us
my comrades, my brothers
my thoughts, their thoughts we tumbled towards
home."
-- dsnake1, excerpts from lonely when away from home
Shared on Poetry Pantry #323 at Poets United.
© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2016
Labels: camaraderie, landscape, military, Poetry
posted by dsnake1 at 9:55 PM
12 Comments:
Beautifully done... So simple and yet so sensitively measured too - a genuine voice and real literary talent on show here... Flawless evocation!
The image of the return to camp is both filled and empty of emotion, maybe that's what seen in soldiers' eyes.
This is a powerful contrast, the soldiers with their weapons, juxtaposed against the toads, the grass, the dew. Wonderfully painted!
Your muse is an admirable companion - a powerful piece...perhaps it reminds us of being alive..but that slick dew screams of something other..of which no one should have to endure
Ah, sometimes there are other things to notice & one misses things like the time of day.
I can imagine that in the army there are many of those kinds of times!
Gosh 💖 the sense of purpose, camaraderie as well as determination is so palpable here 💖
Beautifully penned.
Lots of love,
Sanaa
Loredana,
thank you! it's a pleasure visiting your blog. :)
Scott,
thank you for your kind words. :)
Bjorn,
maybe it's the fatigue & exhaustion, we see things that are only close to our view. :)
thank you for the keen observation.
Sherry,
thank you! :)
Jae,
that muse is an admirable companion, if she feels like it!
yes, that dew screams of life itself.
Mary,
oh yes, the time in the army can be very warped, unless on specific missions/exercises. :)
Sanaa,
thank you! camaraderie is one thing we always have there. :)
Only someone who has serviced could write this powerful poem, In silent thoughts tumbling toward home.
How to see beauty of life even in a hellish situation. What a great poem this is.
Truedessa,
thank you for the kind words. when on foreign soil, our thoughts usually were of home.
Robin,
yes, the green grass slick with dew is life. :)
A vivid and somewhat haunting picture.
thank you, Rosemary! :)
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