Sunday, October 02, 2016

spaces

At first the grief refuses to go away, you wear it like a coat. But it will go away. All you need is the space, and time...



drawing by dsnake1, done with Sketchpad 4.0



spaces





is the house too big now, for myself?
i come home switches on the old tv
there's something on the tube but

i am not sure what it was all about.

the hall is all quiet now. where are
the murdered songs, the off-key crooning,
the hi-fi begging for a rest?

i see the dust motes in the evening light
settling on the unwashed mugs in the sink
i light a joss stick to you,

your name on the altar
the incense smoke curling
like a hesitant hand wave.

i pop a beer, we used to love it,
but now the taste is bitter.
i stare at the words on the label

the house is too big now,
even the shadows seem longer
and the tv mocks in static

but i still need some more space.
                                more time

a moth flies in from the storm-
i watch it
still on the ceiling.


10/03/2016
**********







Between you & me, they should give
us less space.

*

from “Excuse the Strange Spacing” by Florencia Varela


This poem was inspired by the above lines from the Bibliomancy Oracle. It can work in heart-breaking ways.



Shared on Poetry Pantry #322  at Poets United.





© cheong lee san ( dsnake1 ) 2016

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16 Comments:

Blogger Gillena Cox said...

Really we are never alone, as your moth will tell you, but when one leaves the space you shared it difficult to adjust, Time heals i've heard

Happy Sunday Cheong san

much love...

02 October, 2016 22:09  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you for your kind words. we are never really alone, they do live in our hearts.
in our culture the moth can be a spirit of a departed.

02 October, 2016 22:20  
Blogger brudberg said...

The emptiness in this poem is so painful.. after parting every sound or smell can seem havin lack of purpose or even worse a purpose to hurt,

03 October, 2016 00:37  
Blogger Sherry Blue Sky said...

You have painted such a clear picture of loss and solitude. But the walls hold memories so the house would be hard to leave.

03 October, 2016 00:46  
Blogger Sanaa Rizvi said...

Oh this is soo beautiful and poignant 💖 it really pulls on all the heartstrings 💖

03 October, 2016 01:08  
Blogger Jae Rose said...

Wearing grief like a cost is a powerful thought - I think your poem is wise..it takes time to get used to any new space and moment in our lives

03 October, 2016 02:51  
Blogger Mary said...

Ah, this poem leaves me with a lump in my throat really. I feel the missing. Sometimes it just TOO quiet. I appreciated the information about a moth. I won't think about moths in the same way again!

(Always good to see you!)

03 October, 2016 03:01  
Blogger R.K. Garon said...

As always you presented a fine piece.
It's been about a year or maybe less that you turned me onto Bibliomancy... which I use often.
This past week I had a younger brother pass away, will be buried at the Veterans Cemetery with full military honors... I went to Bibliomancy and this is what I got...

eat around the bad parts and pay as you go
*
from “a starving music will come to eat the body” by Carleen Tibbetts
ZQ

03 October, 2016 04:35  
Blogger Susan said...

You sure do capture loss. The space actually gets larger, I think.
I particularly like the music:

"the hall is all quiet now. where are
the murdered songs, the off-key crooning,
the hi-fi begging for a rest?"

03 October, 2016 12:23  
Blogger Sumana Roy said...

even in storm there's a source of light to draw the moth to a wall, giving it time to be still and sheltered....

03 October, 2016 12:31  
Blogger Old Egg said...

Being in this situation we just keep going and find that life is all about us and it is best to join in. We don't forget the one we have lost but neither should we forget ourselves there is still much to do.

03 October, 2016 12:37  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

Bjorn,

you have said it so rightly. after a loss, every sound and smell would have seem quite different.


Sherry,

"the walls hold memories". i so like that. indeed it does. every tile, every shade of paint, every picture and its frame. they somehow represent part of the journey together.


Sanaa,

thank you. it's really for my late spouse.


Jae,

it clings to one, like a coat. it takes time to get over it. loads of time.


Mary,

thank you! i think each culture has its own understanding of symbolism. and this makes it more interesting, isn't it? :)


ZQ,

It's strange what Bibliomancy can throw out. Perhaps not for everyone, but it has inspired me to some of my favourite poems.
sorry to hear about your younger brother, a military man and a veteran, no less. always have a soft spot for soldiers.
**hugs **


Susan,

thank you! we loved our music. her chinese ballads and my english rock co-exist quite happily. we even do some karaoke, thus the "murdered songs". :)


Sumana,

yes, it seeks shelter. i don't drive the moths away. after some time, they fly off on their own.


Robin,

thank you! the living must go on ..living.





03 October, 2016 14:58  
Blogger Susan Anderson said...

The sense of loss is powerful and poignant in this poem. I'm glad the moth flew in.

04 October, 2016 06:32  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

yes, it wanted to keep me company. :)
thank you for visiting my blog, Susan!

04 October, 2016 21:15  
Blogger Rosemary Nissen-Wade said...

Wonderful poem!

06 October, 2016 19:59  
Blogger dsnake1 said...

thank you, Rosemary! :)

06 October, 2016 22:30  

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